I hope PETA doesn't bust into my house right now. If they did, not only would it be an annoyance to shoo away militant animal rights people but also to explain why there is a lot of animal parts all over the place. Right now, I am trying to excavate my living room from under a pile of chicken bones, glitter, fringe, and feathers from the following avians:
Ostrich
Rooster
Peacock
Pheasant
It is beyond my control and add to that the large…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on November 10, 2009 at 4:36pm —
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I promise I'll do a blog and wrap our tour stories but for now I have some sad news...
Sometime during our tour, our extra CDs were stolen from John's marina parking, the secure marina parking for Heather Marina, incidentally right next to the Vancouver Police parking. $4000+ of BJB CDs and LPs were stolen out of a large black set of drawers, his $400 motorcycle jacket (with a broken zipper and a burn h*** on the left arm) and our tool box. So if there is anyone in Vancouver selling…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on November 3, 2009 at 2:38pm —
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Now THAT'S a backpiece!
The last five shows have brought us from the far reaches of Northern Ontario, through the prairies, and now getting back to the Rocky Mountains. While we drove up north I recall being irrationally scared of the province of Ontario when I was younger, and I remembered the old memories I thought I had repressed... When Expo 86 was in Vancouver, my family took me out to it. At an impressionable five years old I remember when we entered the Ontario Pavilion I…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on October 28, 2009 at 9:13am —
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The life-long question that plagues some people (mostly women) has finally been answered. "Where's my pony?" and "I want a pony" are oft-times common childhood dreams and practicality, cost and logistics usually rule this out as a pet. Most find a way to cope with the empty space that not having a pony can cause (a lot of them by claiming that daddy didn't hug them enough and compensating with impressive pole-dancing). It looks like though for seniors in Prince Edward Island though that they…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on October 23, 2009 at 7:51am —
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Our show in Ottawa last night was remarkable; the number of highly attractive people who made it out to our show made it wonderful. I know Quebec doesn't put fluoride in the water, but I think Ottawa must put a hotness additive in their drinking water. I find this kind of funny considering that Quebec seems to be obsessed with sugar and maple syrup - I even saw a feminine hygiene products that came in that scent. Weird.
We are en route to Thunder Bay. This is the farthest north I've…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on October 22, 2009 at 11:25pm —
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Thanks to Scott for documenting our ascent as a marquee act...
So people have been coming to me and asking me what of the differences between European and North American crowds. I think that this may have less to do with my observations and perhaps more to do with a chance to stare at my chest while engaged in conversation. I may be a trifle cynical in my reaction, but if my opinion IS being solicited then I do have some…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on October 19, 2009 at 7:13pm —
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I was checking out my friend's blogs on Live Journal today mostly because there's nothing good on television and also because I'm nosey. I came across on one of the community posts an old 60's ad featuring a mermaid hawking a product called Groom And Clean... You can see it here.
The product promises to groom a gentleman's hair making it grease and dandruff free, while also styling it. It has convincing product demos of how it mixes it water and how much of a dandy it will make you.…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on October 17, 2009 at 9:54am —
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Since we have had a few days off in Fredericton, NB and we now find ourselves in Halifax, the ladies are getting ready to go to Bubbles Mansion dressed as kitties. Right now while we're out in the Maritimes, we're hassling people by imitating their accents. Trust me, sing any Marilyn Manson or Metallica song in an Eastern Canadian accent and it DOES NOT get old, trust me. It might make your bandmates want to kill you, though. But while I'm…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on October 16, 2009 at 7:57pm —
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BJB sent this to me last night and it just confuses the hell out of me...
I never took Jesus for one to gravitate towards our music, but I suppose that since he hung around with the low-brows, the unwanted and the prostitutes, Jesus pretty much lived an early rock and roll lifestyle and therefore is into our music. Actually, if one wants to even go a hair further, we could easily put this in the book of my own cult. Consider the following:
a) We have a prophet…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on October 13, 2009 at 8:07am —
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My head hurts. Being on tour for six months you learn things about yourself: taking a piece of gear to the head will leave a lump on your temple if your not careful, drinking more than four drinks is a bad idea, and dealing with feelings of loneliness and isolation by reaching out online is stupid. These are just some of these lessons learned. After six months I’m finally going to let my liver have some time off and despite the tour being twenty days from being finished. I’m going to hop on the…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on October 12, 2009 at 8:53am —
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Since my last post, BJB has asked me to refrain from talking about my menstrual cycle. So I'd like to start this blog off by only stating the I'm MC Menses, and my flow be fresh...
...
Okay, I've gotten that out of my system. We played our show last night at the Chubby Pickle in Windsor, ON. Sadly, they did not have any t-shirts for sale so I have no way of commemorating the show. As wonderful a name as The Chubby Pickle is, they are not only not capitalizing on it, but…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on October 5, 2009 at 8:34pm —
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There is something sinister about my menstrual cycle. I know there are a lot of Earth Mother types out there who will shake their heads at my lack of enthusiasm about my 'natural body rhythms', but for me personally it's a load of honk. My cramps are crippling and feel like my uterus isn't "part of the harmonized whole" but that it's trying to punch it's way out of my body. All in all, the symptoms seem to be tied into the phases of the moon and not in any positive way. After undergoing some…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on October 4, 2009 at 3:50pm —
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We have a day off today, and it’s sorely needed. BJB’s voice is shot to hell for the moment, Betty’s hips sound like Jiffy-Pop when she moves, JT’s rotator cuff is aching and I’m fine except for the cyst of glitter that is acculminating in my right tear duct. The Voodoo Doll costume bag has slowly been falling apart and last night was the final nail in it’s coffin. As it shed it’s pieces I accused BJB of buying us the luggage equivalent of a leper. This goes to show if you need strong suitcases…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on September 29, 2009 at 4:03pm —
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I found myself in Cracker Barrel this morning. Usually this will mean one of two things; either your near death or your on tour. In my case it was thankfully the latter. Only senior citizens eat there with any regularity and 97% of the clientele is the elderly. Conversely, the other 3% is touring musicians and performers and I have yet to see anyone of middle years eat there who is not host to a sofa-sized ass. It got me to thinking that the change table in the bathroom isn't so much meant for…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on September 25, 2009 at 7:10pm —
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Ah, the power of the blog. I’m going to take a second to bask in the glow of knowing I lit a fire under someone’s ass in Bismark. If you’ve been following this blog (and I know you do, or you fear my cute but vengeful wrath) then you’ll know we ran up against a series of problems in trying to do our show in Bismark, ND due to restrictions and laws banning dancing onstage during a performance unless one was singing or playing an instrument if the venue sold liquor. We had finally relocated the…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on September 21, 2009 at 6:49pm —
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Bloody Betty is in love. Is it her new man? Nope. Is it her new hat? Nope (though it IS pretty sweet). No, our little gore-lesque dancer is enraptured with the city of Milwaukee and it's people. Although the midwest has been good to her so far this city truly captured her heart, which takes some doing; I've seen the box she keeps it in.
We've so far been playing this game on the road up until now called "I Need That Shirt". Not to be confused with YouTube's Kelly here. All the shirts…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on September 19, 2009 at 9:47am —
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We’re now day four into our tour dates and it’s been kind of a strange ride. Our first show in Missoula was a little shaky with the new group structure. We had a tough audience - Brandy Battery’s mom was in the crowd so the standards were exceptionally high. After a better show in Bozeman we were all a great deal more confident with our latest additions - Kate Kerosene and Bloody Betty - making new friends out of our old ones. It wasn’t until we crossed the boarder to North Dakota that things…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on September 14, 2009 at 6:23pm —
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It seems I can't leave the city of Vancouver without everything going to hell in a hand-basket. I don't hold any one person responsible but I think we are letting our civic vigilance slide, as it were. I only mention this because I became susceptible to a strange zombie curse and heard about vicious pinnipeds in the area and would like to ask the city what they plan to do about it. Either way, the Conservatives will blame the Liberals and the NDP, the Liberals will call out the Conservatives…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on September 4, 2009 at 11:20am —
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I can tell when a tour is winding down - all the accrued bruises and marks on my body from nightly flinging myself around on stage and padding the gear with my body during load-out start to fade. I have a series of scratches that I have no recollection where they came from that are finally starting to fade away on my right wrist. Judging by the deepness and patterns I'd say I sucker punched a rabid ferret and they retaliated. Little buggers.
So it's been well over a week since I…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on September 1, 2009 at 6:12am —
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I lost my lead line... I had it a moment ago when I was waiting for the page to upload and then *poof* my thought bubble burst, as it was. I'm finding this is happening more and more as I age and this is probably a combination of factors: stress, late nights, smoky bars, early morning jogs and my steady alcohol intake which can be anything from a dribble to "Whoa! Dam-busters!". It's with this I realize I haven't really blogged that much about the tour itself so I aim to fix that now. Or at…
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Added by Little Miss Risk on August 23, 2009 at 2:33am —
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