i'm an exotic dancer. What's wrong with it?

[Phoenix Arousing (Valezka Vidra)]

Ok, so I don't dance al the time, but I waitress and dance sometimes..................what is wrong with the exotic dancing?  I don't see anything wrong with it, but people seem to look down on me for it.  why?

[Domestic Doll]

There isn't anything wrong with exotic dancing. Most of society just associates pole dancing with being a prostitute. It's been MY personal expierience that dancers will glady do "extras" for extra cash. Which I DO believe to be in bad taste if you don't actually work at a legitimate cat house. 

So it's your behavior that would define your morality (I personally think). I know several dancers...some are good women trying to make an extra buck for their family or put themselves through school. Some are good women that have some nasty habits (drugs, LOTS of men/women) that are in it to have a "good time". Which is fine, but those women will set up a label that is put on all dancers becasue society can't see past their shallow thoughts.

If your gonna dance, dance with class, dignity and pride. And show it out of the club as well. There is nothing wrong with the female form. If you feel your doing nothing wrong, then f#@k everyone else.

[Roxy Tart {PL Team / Comm. Mgr}]

You won't find many people in this scene who look down on it. But out there.... in the main stream; people are prudes, or in need of a cause. "It's degrading" "those girls are sluts" "they have no self esteem" "she must be a hooker"....I bet you've heard all of these and more, I know I have. I was a stripper years ago, and to be honest, I loved it. Amazing money, made my own schedule, got to wear pretty, sparkly, stuff. It was my job to be pretty, and I got paid well for it. I saw nothing wrong with it then and see nothing wrong with it now. It's not an easy job. It was my experience that the people talking s*** are women... and most of them are women who can't be a stripper. I'm not trying to be mean, but it's the truth. They talk s*** and say mean things because they are jealous! Just remember, it's your life, do what's right for you... and forget the haters.

[Auburn Hills]

I don't see anything wrong with it and agee with Domestic Doll & Roxy.  Most people that think it is wrong have never stepped foot in a club.  All they know of it is from movies and tall tales told by drunken bachelor party goers.  I worked in clubs for about 5 years many years ago as a dancer, cocktail waitress and club manager.  I met alot of lovely ladies that chose their job for the hours, money, freedom and they love being female.   Just like all facets in life, you get the good and the bad. 

[John at My Favorite Pinups{★}]

I got no problem with it... I dated a dancer at one point in my life.

The world is full of people who try to judge people against some arbitrary standard that they see as a societal norm.

personally I think it's all made up s*** and, in general, people need to reexamine their own moral code.

[RL]

I agree with Domestic Doll. I have been in the theater, and beyond since I was a kid And have seen alot. Actors and actresses have similar problems. My 1st performance was at 5 yrs old, and I have been branded as a "Deviant" since before uberty. The branding comes from society and not because of the individual. I have had this conversation many time  in many places, so I can speak at length. As she said don't take it personnally. Make your own rules and live by them. And keep dancing, it heals the soul. R

[The Trousseau]

I wanted to, a few years ago.  Back when I thought about it, I was 5'9" and tone from years of college level athletics and later years of daily volleyball.  I was, more than once, described as having, "legs to my neck," and years of dance training, mostly belly dance with some classical forms thrown in. I was 40, at the time, and knew quite a few women who were making upwards of $90,000 a year who were that age. 

I certainly don't look down on it, nor does jealousy have any place in why I chose not to. 

For starters, so many of the young ones, though they made good money, spent it so quickly.  So little was saved, and much was spent on stuff that was not good for them.  And as I looked at them, I thought that each one of them could be my daughter, and how sad I would be if they were spending their money that way. I didn't see it as a healthy lifestyle. 

Another issue I had was that, well, maybe it was my age and experience, but I realized that the men were paying for a fantasy.  The smart women knew that, and they worked it.  I guess it is the same thing, in theory, as any other sales job, or casino work, but I also knew that a lot of those men really thought they had a chance with those girls.  And if they weren't there looking for a girlfriend, they were there to pay for the opportunity to go home and think about them.  And not just think about them. 

So, I really have no issue with girls dancing.  Some really smart girls do.  I just wouldn't want my daughter or my nieces doing it. 

Should you want some advice from this much older lady-- go, do it.  Make lots of money and save it.  Don't spend it.  Don't hang out with the dancers because most of them are dumb as rocks.  (Sorry, but I have been around many of them.  And they are.)  Make enough to reach a goal and then get out of the business.  And when those who want to put you down for doing what you do, smile and walk away.  They don't live your life.  They don't know you, they don't know the business.   But get away.  It is not a long term gig. 

[Buttercup Clothing]

That sounds like a pretty good job if you ask me!

Roxy Tart {Madam/Community Mgr} said:

 I was a stripper years ago, and to be honest, I loved it. Amazing money, made my own schedule, got to wear pretty, sparkly, stuff. It was my job to be pretty, and I got paid well for it.

[Roxy Tart {PL Team / Comm. Mgr}]

It was! It was a great job if you could handle it, and was fun while it lasted.

Buttercup Clothing said:

That sounds like a pretty good job if you ask me!

Roxy Tart {Madam/Community Mgr} said:

 I was a stripper years ago, and to be honest, I loved it. Amazing money, made my own schedule, got to wear pretty, sparkly, stuff. It was my job to be pretty, and I got paid well for it.

[Cynthia Marie]

I have a very close friend who is a sex worker in the city I used to live in. She was a full time escort, and made thousands of dollars nightly, just attending various events with men who were paying for her company, and occasionally she would be in stages of undress in private quarters. Shockingly, many people not 'in the know' of what escorting is assumed she was a prostitute, which was immediately thought of as being wrong. We were in an area of the south and people were very moral about how they felt women should act.

If there was anything I got out of knowing her, it was how pro-women the field of sex work can be. The boss of the escort service she worked for was female, and she knew she was making more money than men in the same job, which can't be said for many big company gigs. Women more commonly than not are not started at the same pay rate as men.

She is a patron of the arts, and organized the many burlesque acts coming to town. She brought a national touring act called the 'Sex Workers Art Show' and I was amazed at how, this career path - where women are conditioned to feel ashamed of - had lead her to be an ideal citizen in her community, if you ask my opinion.

[Phoenix Arousing (Valezka Vidra)]

Hey guys,

 

     Thanks for all your insight! I'm currently 30 years old (31 is creeping up quicker than the reaper on a fresh corpse) and I absolutely love dancing.  I am now a Deja Vu showgirl in the city of Stockton, CA; the money is great.  I don't spend it frivolously (well, too frivolously) on dumb bad habits, and since I am of my fourth decade I certainly  know the value of a dollar.  In contrast, I actually do feel that this is an industry that I would love to stay in for a long time...so as long as I stay looking 22, haha!  To me, dancing is very empowering, confidence building, and unlike some younger dames, I actually am there to "act" out the part.  The only thing I don't like about the industry is working with younger people:  all the drama that is started about me so far has got me thinking that these girls are in desperate need of some schizophrenia medication.